The Social Self
The Social Self
Though I
am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance.
—William
Shakespeare
James
Carroll is a best-selling author, novelist, and journalist. He comes from a
remarkable family whose members played important, sometimes decisive roles in
the events of the late 20th century. Carroll’s life illustrates how the
interlocking infl uences of birth, family life, education, and historical
forces all infl uence the development of one’s sense of self.
Carroll’s
father was the most important infl uence in his life. His father’s dream was to
be a priest, and James lived that dream for his father. He was the altar boy
who became the priest and the college chaplain. Carroll loved his life as a
priest. Soon, however, Carroll’s life changed in ways that were unexpected and
traumatic. These events created a breach between son and father, a breach only
partially closed before the father died.
It is easy
to see why Carroll’s father so strongly infl uenced him as a young man. He was
a fi gure of mythic proportions; he led a life almost only possible in movies,
surely a figment of Hollywood imagination. As a young lawyer, Carroll’s father
caught the eye of FBI director J. Edgar Hoover and became a top agent. When the
Vietnam War began, the U.S. Air Force recruited the FBI agent and made him
director of the agency that selected the bombing targets in Vietnam.
Improbably, the now General Carroll—James’s father—was the individual in charge
of the U.S. Air Force’s war against North Vietnam.
The
Vietnam War forced the young Carroll to confront exactly who he was. On the one
hand, his father was helping to run the war in Vietnam, and James’s brother,
who was an FBI agent, was tracking down draft evaders and keeping tabs on
antiwar protesters. James’s superiors in the Catholic Church also strongly
supported the war. But Carroll, as a young seminarian, was turning against the
war that his father was directing. In a moving account of his crisis of
conscience and self-identity, Carroll, in his memoir An American Requiem
(1996), chronicles his confl ict with church hierarchy, the government, his
father, and most of all himself. The son, who still admired and loved his
father the general, began to align himself with antiwar protestors, draft
resisters, and Catholic antiwar radicals.
30 Social
Psychology
In
Memorial Bridge, Carroll’s stirring novel of the Vietnam War period, the author
artfully and seamlessly painted a barely fi ctionalized picture of the
conflict between his father and himself,
a confl ict that forever changed his sense of who he was. Carroll recalls being a participant
in the famous antiwar demonstration at the Pentagon and looking up at the sixth
fl oor of the building, knowing that his father was looking down on his son, the
protestor, the radical, who had just left the priesthood. But perhaps the most
defi ning moment of Carroll’s life was an earlier event, the moment that he
publicly and irrevocably created a self-identity separate and distinct from his
father, much of his family, and the experience of his life. When as a newly
ordained priest Carroll conducted his fi rst mass at an air force base in front of his family and
his father’s colleagues, the generals who were directing the Vietnam War, he
expressed his moral outrage at their conduct, taking that moment to express
clearly—a clarity he may have regretted later—his personal identity as distinct
from his family’s image of him.
13. How do we present the self to
others?
14. What is self-monitoring?
15. What is self-handicapping?
16. How accurate are we in assessing the
impression we convey?
17. What is the spotlight effect?
18. What is the illusion of
transparency?
In
Carroll’s life, we can see the interplay of the various parts of the self: The
personal self—his own beliefs, knowledge, and principles—and that part of the self
infl uenced by his relationships with family, friends, and church. Finally, we
see the impact of the great social events of the time. It is no wonder that
Carroll the novelist can write movingly and fervently about the effects of
family, church, and country on one’s self-concept. Carroll notes that he was
much like his father and that he tried to live his father’s dream, but events
conspired to break both their hearts (Carroll, 1996).
Self-Concept
How do we
develop a coherent sense of who we are? The vignette describing James Carroll suggests that our personal
experiences, interaction with others, and cultural forces all play some role in our defi nition of self.
Who am I? The answer to this question is the driving force in our lives. If you
were asked to defi ne yourself, you most likely would use sentences containing
the words I, me, mine, and myself (Cooley, 1902; Schweder, Much, Mahapatra,
& Park, 1997).
The self
may be thought of as a structure that contains the organized and stable
contents of one’s personal experiences (Schlenker, 1987). In this sense, the self
is an object, something inside us that we may evaluate and contemplate. The
self is “me,” the sum of what I am. A signifi cant part of what we call the self
is knowledge. All the ideas, thoughts,
and information that we have about ourselves—about who we are, what characteristics we have, what our personal
histories have made us, and what we may
yet become—make up our self-concept.
Self-Knowledge:
How Do We Know Thy self?
We use
several sources of social information to forge our self-concept. One comes from
our view of how other people react to us. These refl ected appraisals shape our
self-concept (Cooley, 1902; Jones & Gerard, 1967). A second social source
is the com- parisons we make with other people (Festinger, 1950).
Self-knowledge comes from the social comparison process by which we compare our
own reactions, abilities, and attributes to others (Festinger, 1950). We do
this because we need accurate information so that we may succeed. We need to
know if we are good athletes or students or race car drivers so that we may
make rational choices. Social comparison is a control and attributes device,
because it makes our world more predictable.
reflected
appraisal A source of social information involving our view
of how other people react to us.
Chapter 2 The Social Self 31
social
comparison process A source of
social knowledge involving how we compare our reactions, abilities,
to others.
A third source of information comes from
the self-knowledge gained by observing our own behavior. Daryl Bem (1967)
suggested that people really do not know why they do things, so they simply
observe their behavior and assume that their motives were consistent with their
behavior. Someone who rebels against authority may simply observe her
behavior and conclude,
“Well, I must
be a rebel.”
Therefore, we may obtain knowledge of our self simply by observing
ourselves behave and then infer that our private beliefs must coincide with our
public actions. Another method of knowing the self is through introspection,
the act of examining our own thoughts and feelings.
introspection The act of
examining our own thoughts and
feelings to understand ourselves, which
may yield a somewhat biased picture of our own internal state.
Introspection
is a method we all use to understand ourselves, but there is evidence to
suggest that we may get a somewhat biased picture of our own internal state.
Thinking about our attitudes and the reasons we hold them can sometimes be
disruptive and confusing (Wilson, Dunn, Kraft, & Lisle, 1989). More generally,
the process of introspection—of looking into our own mind, rather than just
behaving—can have this effect.
For
example, if you are forced to think about why you like your romantic partner,
you might fi nd it disconcerting if you are not able to think of any good
reasons why you are in this relationship. This doesn’t
mean that you don’t have reasons, but they may not be accessible or easy to retrieve. Much
depends on the strength of the relationship. If the relationship is not strong,
thinking about the relationship could be disruptive because we might not think
up many positive reasons in support of the relationship. If it is pretty
strong, then reasoning might further strengthen it. The stronger our attitude
or belief, the more likely that thinking about it will increase the consistency
between the belief and our behavior (Fazio, 1986).
Personal
Attributes and Self-Concept
Now that
we have noted some of the methods we may use to form and gain access to our self-concept, let’s
see what is inside. What kind of information and feelings are contained in the self? First of all,
the self-concept contains ideas and beliefs about personal attributes. A person
may think of herself as female, American, young, smart, compassionate, the
daughter of a single mother, a good basketball player, reasonably attractive,
hot-tempered, artistic, patient, and a movie fan. All of these attributes and
many more go into her self-concept.
personal
attributes An aspect of the
self-concept involving the attributes we believe we have.
Researchers investigated the self-concepts
of American schoolchildren by asking
them the
following kinds of questions (McGuire & McGuire, 1988, p. 99):
• Tell us about yourself.
• Tell us what you are not.
• Tell us about school.
• Tell us about your family.
These open-ended probes revealed that children
and adolescents often defined them-selves by characteristics that were unique or
distinctive. Participants who possessed a distinctive characteristic were much
more likely to mention that attribute than were those who were less distinctive
on that dimension (McGuire & McGuire, 1988).
32 Social
Psychology
distinctiveness theory The theory suggesting that individuals think
of themselves in terms of those
attributes or dimensions that make them different—rather than in terms of
attributes they have in common with others.
According
to distinctiveness theory, people think of themselves in terms of those
attributes or dimensions that make them different, that are distinctive, rather
than in terms of attributes they have in common with others. People, for
example, who are taller or shorter than others, or wear glasses, or are left-handed,
are likely to incorporate that characteristic into their self-concept.
People
usually are aware of the attributes they have in common with other
individuals. A male going to an all-male
high school is aware that he is male. But being male may not be a defi ning part
of his self-concept because everybody around him has that same characteristic.
He wills defi ne himself by attributes that make him different from other males,
such as being a debater or a football player. It may certainly be important in
another social context, such as when taking part in a debate about changing
gender roles.
People
who belong to nondominant or minority groups are more likely to include their
gender, ethnicity, or other identity in their self-concept than are those in
dominant, majority groups (e.g., white male). Among the schoolchildren in the
study (McGuire & McGuire, 1988),
boys who lived
in households that
were predominantly female
mentioned their gender more often, as did girls who lived in households
that were pre- dominately male.
Of
course, not all knowledge about the self is conscious simultaneously. At
any
given time, we tend to be aware of only parts of our overall self-concept.
This working self-concept varies depending on the nature of the social
situation and how we feel at that moment (Markus & Gnawers, 1986). So when
we are depressed, our working self-concept would be likely to include all those
thoughts about ourselves that have to do with failure or negative traits.
Although
the self-concept is relatively stable, the notion of a working self-concept suggests
that the self can vary from one situation to another (Kunda, 1999). For
example, as the late Ziva Kunda (1999) pointed out, if you are shy but are
asked to give examples of when you were very outgoing, at least momentarily you
might feel less shy than usual.
However,
the ease with which the self may change may depend on how self-knowledge is
organized and how important the behavior is.
The
Self and Memory
In
addition to personal attributes, the self-concept contains memories, the basis
for knowledge about oneself. The self is concerned with maintaining positive
self-feelings, thoughts, and evaluations. One way it does this is by infl
uencing memory. Anthony Greenwald (1980) suggested that the self acts as a kind
of unconscious monitor that enables people to avoid disquieting or distressing
information. The self demands that we preserve what we have, especially that
which makes us feel good about ourselves.
According
to Greenwald, the self employs biases that work somewhat like the mind- control
techniques used in totalitarian countries. In such countries, the government
con- trols information and interpretations of events so that the leadership is
never threatened. Similarly, we try to
control the thoughts and memories we have about ourselves. The self is
totalitarian in the sense that it records our good behaviors and ignores our
unsavory ones, or at least rationalizes them away. The self is a personal
historian, observing and recording information about the self—especially the
information that makes us looks good. Like a totalitarian government, Greenwald
claims, the self tends to see itself as the origin of all positive things and
to deny that it has ever done anything bad.
autobiographical memory Memory for information relating to the
self that plays a powerful role in recall of events.
Is
it true, as Greenwald predicted, that the self is a kind of fi lter that makes
us feel good by gathering self-serving
information and discarding information that discomfits us? The study of
autobiographical memory—memory for information relating to self—shows that the
self does indeed play a powerful role in the recall of events (Woike,
Gerskovich, Piorkowski, & Polo, 1999). The self is an especially powerful memory
system, because events and attributes stored in the self have many associa-tions
(Greenwald & Banaji, 1989). Let’s say, for example, that you are asked to
recall whether you have
done anything in your life that exemplifies a trait such as honesty or
creativity. A search of your self-memory system perhaps would conjure up a
recent event in which you devised a creative solution to a problem. The memory
of that event might trigger similar memories from earlier periods in your
history. You probably would be able to generate a fl ood of such memories.
Chapter 2 The Social Self 33
Most people take only about 2 seconds to
answer questions about their traits (Klein, Loftus, &Plog, 1992). This is
because we have a kind of summary knowledge of our self-traits, especially the
most obvious ones. Such a handy summary makes it harder to access memories that
confl ict with our positive self-concept, however. As noted earlier, memories
that match a person’s self-concept are recalled more easily
than those that clash
with that concept (Neimeyer & Rareshide, 1991). If you perceive yourself as
an honest person, you will have trouble digging up memories in which you have
behaved dishonestly.
A research study of social memory of
everyday life among college students bore out these findings (Skowronski, Betz,
Thompson, & Shannon, 1991).
Participants were asked to keep two diaries: In one, they recorded events
that occurred in their own lives, and in the other, they recorded events that
occurred in the life of a close relative or friend, someone they saw on a daily
basis. The students had to ask the consent of the other person, and they
recorded the events discreetly. Participants made entries in the diaries for
self and other for roughly 10 weeks, the length of the academic quarter. At the
end of the quarter, the participants took a memory test on the events recorded in
the two diaries. They were presented with the recorded events from the diaries
in a random order and were asked to indicate how well they remembered the
event, the date it occurred, and whether it was a unique episode.
The researchers found that participants
recalled recent events more quickly than earlier ones, with faster retrieval of
the oldest episodes than of those in the middle. They also found that pleasant events
were recalled better than unpleasant ones, and extreme events, pleasant and
unpleasant, were recalled better than neutral episodes. Pleasant events that
especially fi t the person‘s self-concept were most easily recalled. The self, then,
monitors our experiences, processing information in ways that make us look good
to ourselves. We interpret, organize, and remember interactions and events in
self-serving ways, recalling primarily pleasant, self-relevant events that fi t
our self-concept. Obviously, this built-in bias infl uences the manner in which
we understand our social world and how we interact with other people. Without
realizing it, we are continually constructing a view of the world that is
skewed in our favor.
Emotions
and Autobiographical Memories
Some of
you may be thinking as you read this, “These fi ndings don’t
square with what happens to me when I think about my past.” It is true that you don‘t
always retrieve memories that are positive, pleasant, or bolster good feelings. Indeed,
sometimes the precise opposite is true. McFarland and Buehler (1998) examined
how negative moods affect autobiographical memory.
Generally,
the memories you may recall seem to fi t the mood that you are in. The
explanation for this mood-congruence recall is that our mood makes it more
likely that we will fi nd memories of events that fi t that mood: positive mood,
positive recall; negative mood, negative recall. People who experience lots of
negative moods can enter into a self-defeating cycle wherein their negative
moods prime or key negative memories that in turn make the individual even more
sad or depressed.
34 Social
Psychology
Why do
some people in negative moods perpetuate that mood and others make themselves
feel better? It appears that the approach to how we retrieve these memories is
the key (Lyubomirsky, Caldwell, & Nolen-Hoeksema, 1998). If you adopt a focused
refl ective attitude, which means that you may admit that you failed at this
task, you explore the nature of why you feel bad and work to regulate that
mood. This is in con- trast to people who ruminate over their moods. That is,
they focus neurotically and pas- sively on negative events and feelings
(McFarland & Buehler, 1998).
Of course,
over our lifetimes our experiences may very well alter, sometimes dra-
matically, our sense of ourselves. If this change is signifi cant, we may look
back and wonder if we are in fact the same person we once were. William James
(1890), the renowned 19th-century psychologist and philosopher, observed that
the self was both a “knower” (“I”) and an object (“me”). For college students,
the transition from high school to university may produce a confl ict between
the person‘s current sense of self and
that other person that existed before the transition: “I am not the same person
that I was 2 years ago.”
Psychologists
Lisa Libby and Richard Eibach (2002) investigated what happened when people
thought about behaviors that confl icted with their current self-concept. When this happens, individuals refer to their
“old self” in the third person, as if it were an object no longer part of the
psyche. Autobiographical memory, then, is not static, but may be altered by our
current self-concept. For example, someone who recalls that he was a chronic
overeater in the past may transform that bit of autobiographical memory into
motivation not to overindulge at this Thanksgiving’s
meal (Libby & Eibach, 2002). Major life changes often require
that people disengage from their past. Imagine, for example, “born again”
religious experiences, or surviving a deadly cancer, or a divorce and the
resultant radical change in lifestyle. These events can make people “disiden-
tify” with their autobiographical memories of their past selves (Libby &
Eibach, 2002). It is not as if we create
a brand-new self, but rather we place the old one in a kind of cold storage.
Religion and
the Self
Peers,
school experiences, and involvement in religious activities and institutions
may have profound effects on self-knowledge. As we suggested in the previous
section, the self-concept is not an unchanging vault of personal information
but is powerfully infl u- enced by social, situational, and cultural forces. We
saw the infl uence of the church on the life of James Carroll, the priest. In
novelist Carroll’s books after he left the priest- hood, we can see that the church
still has an enormous infl uence on his thinking and his view of himself and the
world.
Bruce E.
Blaine and his coworkers investigated the impact of religious belief on self-concept
(Blaine, Trivedi, & Eshleman, 1998).
Blaine pointed out that religion ought to be a powerful infl uence on the
self-concepts of believers. Religious beliefs typically set standards for
character and behavior, emphasizing positive behaviors and exhorting believers
to refrain from negative ones. Blaine found that individuals who indicated that
they maintained religious beliefs (Protestant, Catholic, or Jewish) provided
more positive and certain self-descriptions. These positive self-descriptions
were not limited in Blaine’s study to religious spheres solely but
were also related to positive self-descriptions
in the individuals’ work and social lives.
Blaine and
his colleagues (1998) suggested several reasons for these findings. The first
is that religious teachings may have clear relevance to the business world to
the extent that people who hold religious beliefs actually apply them to other
life activities. As one example, Blaine notes the Jewish Torah warns that
interest ought not be charged on goods sold to needy countrymen. Religion also
may be an organizing principle for the self-concept and thereby embrace all
facets of life.
The Self:
The Influence of Groups and Culture
Thus far
we have focused on the individual self, that part of the self that refers to
our self-knowledge, including our private thoughts and evaluations of who and
what we are. But as we saw in James Carroll’s life, the groups
to which we belong and the culture in
which we live play crucial roles in sculpting our self-concept.
The
collective selfis that part of our self-concept that comes from our membership
in groups. This collective self is reflected in thoughts such as, “In my family
I am considered the responsible, studious one.” It reflects the evaluation of
the self by important and specific groups to which the person belongs
(Greenwald & Pratkanis, 1984). Basic research on groups shows that the
groups we belong to have a strong influence on selfconcept (Gaertner,
Sedikides, & Graetz, 1999). Our behavior is often changed by what other
group members’ demand of us.
These two
representations, the individual and the collective selves, do not occupy equal
space and influence in the self-concept. The relative importance of each
component of the self for an individual is determined in large part by the
culture in which the person lives. In some cultures, the individual self is
dominant. Cultures that emphasize individual striving and achievement—societies
that are concerned with people “finding themselves”—produce individuals in
which the private self is highly complex, containing many traits and beliefs.
Other cultures may emphasize specific groups, such as family or religious
community, and therefore the collective self is primary. Collectivist societies
show a pattern of close links among individuals who define themselves as
interdependent members of groups such as family, coworkers, and social groups
(Vandello & Cohen, 1999). However, even within societies, the degree of
collectivism may vary. Vandello and Cohen (1999) argued that collectivist
tendencies in the United States would be highest in the Deep South, because
that region still maintains a strong regional identity. Vandello and Cohen also
thought that the greatest individualistic tendencies would be found in the West
and mountain states. Figure 2.1 shows a map that identifies regional
differences in collectivism. You can see that Vandello and Cohen’s
predictions were
confirmed. Note that the states with the highest collectivism scores contain
either many different cultures (e.g., Hawaii) or a strong and dominant religion
(e.g., Utah).
One way to
determine whether the individual or collective self is the dominant
representation of who we are is to observe what occurs when one or another of
these images of the self is threatened. Is a threat to the individual self more
or less menacing than a threat to our collective self? If the status of the
important groups to which we belong is threatened, is this more upsetting to us
than if our individual, personal self is under attack?
In a
series of experiments, Gaertner, Sedikides, and Graetz (1999) tried to answer
these questions by comparing individuals’responses to threats to the collective or
individual self. For example, in one study, women at a university were given a
psychological test and were told either that they personally had not done very
well on the test or that an important group to which they belong (women at the
university) had not done well. Similar procedures were used in other
experiments. Gaertner and his colleagues found that compared to a threat to the
collective self, a threat to the individual self resulted in the perception
that the threat was more severe, a more negative mood, more anger, and the
participants’denial of the accuracy or validity of the test or source of
the threat.
The
results suggest that the individual self is primary, and the collective self is
less so. Of course, this does not mean that the collective self is not crucial.
It and our group memberships provide protection and financial and social
rewards. But all things being equal, it appears that, in the United States, our
individual self is more important to us than our collective self.
Who Am I?
The Influence of Culture on Self-Concept
Nothing,
it seems, could be more personal and individual than how we answer the
question, Who am I? But as it turns out, our answer is powerfully shaped by the
culture in which we grew up and developed our self-concept. As we have
suggested, some cultures place more emphasis on the uniqueness of the
individual—the private self—whereas others focus on how the individual is
connected to important others—the collective self.
In a
culture that emphasizes the collective self, such as Japan, individuals are
more likely to define themselves in terms of meeting the expectations of others
rather than of fulfilling their own private needs. In fact, if you asked
Japanese participants to answer the question, Who am I? (a common technique for
investigating self-concept), you would find that they give many more social
responses (“I am an employee at X”) than do Americans (Cousins, 1989). In
contrast, Americans are more likely to emphasize the content of the individual
(private) self, defining themselves with such statements as “I am
strong-willed.” The Japanese view themselves as part of a social context,
whereas Americans tend to assume they have a self that is less dependent on any
set of social relations (Cousins, 1989; Ross & Nisbett, 1991). Individuals
in cultures that emphasize the collective self are also less likely to view
themselves as the focus of attention in social interactions (Markus &
Kitayama, 1991; Ross & Nisbett, 1991). Japanese appear to view their peers,
rather than themselves, as the focus of attention. Consequently, social
interactions in Japan are quite different from those in a society such as the
United States.
Individual-self
societies emphasize self-fulfillment at the expense of communal relationships;
collective-self societies are more concerned with meeting shared obligations
and helping others. In Haiti, for example, where the culture emphasizes the
collective self, people are willing to share houses and food with relatives and
friends for long periods of time.
Of course,
no matter the dominant sense of self in each culture, sometimes situational
factors will determine which self is dominant. Gardner, Gabriel, and Lee (1999)
showed that the individual self may be temporarily more dominant in a
collectivist culture when people are focused on personal issues—say, one’s
intelligence or one’s goals
in life. Similarly, people who live in an individualistic culture may
temporarily focus on collectivist factors when confronted by issues involving
group belongingness (“I am a member of Kappa Kappa Gamma”).
However,
whatever the effects of temporary situational factors, obviously, the thoughts
and traits that make up the core of the self of a Japanese or Haitian person
are likely to differ from the content of the self of an American. We would
expect many more individual attributes to be part of an American self-concept.
Japanese or Haitian individuals would probably emphasize attributes that
reflect their similarities with others, whereas Americans are more likely to
emphasize attributes that make them different from other people.
This
tendency to emphasize attributes that make an individual stand out in American
society and to blend in and not be conspicuous in Japanese society may very
well be due to historical and cultural processes that affect how individuals
behave. For example, in the United States, our sense of well-being, of being
happy or pleased with ourselves, depends to a great extent on whether we are
seen as better—more accomplished, perhaps richer—than other people. But,
Shinobu Kitayama, a Japanese social psychologist familiar with the United
States, suggests that a sense of well-being in Japan depends less on attributes
that make individuals different from others and more on correcting shortcomings
and deficits (Kitayama, Markus, Matsumoto, & Norasakkunkit, 1997). Research
shows that the psychological andphysical well-being of Japanese persons can be
predicted quite accurately from the lack of negative characteristics and not
from the presence of positive attributes (Kitayama et al., 1997). In the United
States, in contrast, how positive we feel about ourselves is directly related
to our sense of personal well-being (Diener & Diener, 1995). So these
social psychological aspects of self-representations—the individual and the
collective selves—are caused by historical forces that emphasized individuality
in the United States and group harmony in Japan.
We see in
this example both the pervasive role of the self-concept in directing behavior
and the widespread role of culture in determining ideas about the self. The
self-concept is not just a private, personal construct; culture plays a part in
shaping the individual’s deepest levels of personal knowledge.
Organizing
Knowledge: Self-Schemas
Whatever
the culture one lives in, people don’t think of themselves as just chaotic masses of attributes and memories.
Instead, they arrange knowledge and information about themselves and their
attributes into self-schemas (Markus, 1977; Markus & Zajonc, 1985). A
schemais an organized set of related cognitions—bits of knowledge and
information—about a particular person, event, or experience. A self-schema is
an arrangement of information, thoughts, and feelings about ourselves,
including information about our gender, age, race or ethnicity, occupation,
social roles, physical attractiveness, intelligence, talents, and so on. People
have many different self-schemas for the different areas of life activities.
Self-schemas
serve a very important function: They organize our self-related experiences so
that we can respond quickly and effectively in social situations. They help us
interpret situations, and they guide our behavior. Schemas also help us
understand new events (Scheier & Carver, 1988). You may have a self-schema
about how you act in an emergency, for example. From past experience and from
your ideals and expectations about yourself, you may believe that you are a
person who stays calm, acts responsibly, and takes care of others, or one who
panics and has to be taken care of by others. These beliefs about yourself
influence your behavior when an emergency arises in the future. Or perhaps you
have a self-schema about being a runner. When you hear people talking about keeping
fit or eating the right foods, you know what they are talking about and how it
relates to you. In these ways, self-schemas contribute to our sense of control
over our social world.
Self-schemas
lend order to our past experiences as well. They guide what we encode (place)
into memory and influence how we organize and store that memory. Memories that
match our self-schemas are recalled more easily than are those that do not
(Neimeyer & Rareshide, 1991). Self-schemas also influence how we think we
will behave in the future. A person who thinks of himself as socially awkward,
for example, may behave inappropriately in social situations. And based on his
behavior in the past, he expects to behave inappropriately in future social
situations.
People
tend to have elaborate schemas about areas of life that are important to their
self-concepts. Markus (1977) observed that people may be either schematic or
aschematic with respect to various attributes that are in the self-concept. The
term schematic means that the individual has an organized self-schema in an
activity that the individual rates as important. In other areas of life, those
that are not important to us or that may not even exist for us, people are said
to be aschematic. That is, they do not have an organized self-schema in that
domain.
Sexuality
and Self-Schemas
Sexuality
is clearly a fundamental behavior, and therefore we expect people to have
sexual self-schemasof varying degrees of organization. A sexual self-schema
refers to how we think about the sexual aspects of the self. Sexual schemas are
derived from past sexual knowledge and experience and, as all schemas do, they
guide our future (sexual) activity. Cyranowski and Andersen (1998) studied the
sexual self-schemas of university women and found that four different schemas
emerged. Women who were schematic—that is, had well-developed schemas—displayed
either positive or negative schemas. These positive and negative schemas
reflected their individual past sexual history as well as their current sexual
activity. As the sexual schema graph shows, positive-schema women had more
previous sexual relationships (Figure 2.2) and scored higher measures of
passionate attachment to their partners (Figure 2.3). These women were more
likely to be in a current sexual relationship. Negative-sexual-schema women
displayed an avoidance of intimacy and passion and were much more anxious about
sexual activity.
Some women
had both negative and positive aspects to their self-schemas, and they were
labeled co-schematic. Whereas co-schematic women see themselves as open,
passionate, and romantic (as do the positive-schema women), they differ from
the positiveschema women in that they hold negative self-views, and this leads
to anxieties about being rejected or abandoned by their partners.
Aschematic
women, like negative-schema women, have fewer romantic attachments, experience
less passionate emotions about love, and avoid emotional intimacy. Aschematic
women tend to avoid sexual situations and display anxiety about sex. A major
difference between aschematic women and negative-schema women is that
aschematic women do not have negative self-views. They are just less interested
in sexual activity. Table 2.1 summarizes these findings.
Whereas
women express sexual self-schemas that fit roughly into categories, men’s
sexual self-schemas
appear to flow along a continuum, ranging from highly schematic to aschematic
(Andersen, Cyranowski, & Espindle, 1999). Men who are schematic have sexual
schemas that reflect strong emotions of passion and love, attributes shared
with positive-schematic women. However, these men see themselves as strong and
aggressive, with liberal sexual attitudes (Andersen et al., 1999). Schematic
men lead varied sexual lives, may engage in quite casual sex, but are also
capable of strong attachments. On the other end of the scale, we find
aschematic men, who lead quite narrow sexual lives and have few if any sexual
partners.
The more
varied and complex our self is, the more self-schemas we will have. We can see
that men and women have sexual self-schemas of varying degrees of organization,
and these schemas reflect their sexual past and guide their current (and
future) sexual behavior. These cognitive representations or self-schemas
reflect both the importance of the behavior represented and the emotional tone
of the behavior.
People
differ in the number of attributes, memories, and self-schemas that are part of
their self-concept. Some people have highly complex selves, others much less
complex. Self-complexity is important in influencing how people react to the
good and bad events in life. Someone who is, say, an engineer, an opera lover,
a mother, and an artist can absorb a blow to one of her selves without much
damage to her overall self-concept (Linville, 1985, 1987). If her latest
artistic endeavors meet unfavorable reviews, this woman’s
sense of self is buffered by the fact that there is much more to her than being
an artist. She is still
a mother, an engineer, an opera lover, and much more. People who are low in
self-complexity may be devastated by negative events, because there is little
else to act as a buffer.
Self-Esteem:
Evaluating the Self
The self
is more than a knowledge structure. The self also has a larger sense of our
overall worth, a component that consists of both positive and negative
self-evaluations. This is known as self-esteem. We evaluate, judge, and have
feelings about ourselves. Some people possess high self-esteem: They regard
themselves highly and are generally pleased with who they are. Others have low
self-esteem, feel less worthy and good, and may even feel that they are
failures and incompetent.
Self-esteem
is affected both by our ideas about how we are measuring up to our own
standards and by our ability to control our sense of self in interactions with
others. Both these processes—one primarily internal, the other primarily
external—have important repercussions on our feelings about ourselves.
Internal
Infl uences on Self-Esteem
Our
feelings about ourselves come from many sources. Some, perhaps most, we carry
forward from childhood, when our basic self-concepts were formed from
interactions with our parents and other adults. Research in child development
indicates that people develop basic feelings of trust, security, and self-worth
or mistrust, insecurity, and worthlessness from these early relationships and
experiences.
Self-Esteem
and Emotional Intelligence
Our
emotions are important sources of information. Emotions are a kind of early
warning system, bells and whistles that tell us that important things are
happening in our environment.
Social
psychologists have recently started to take a close scientific look at the
concept of emotional intelligence,a person’s ability to perceive, use, understand,
and manage emotions
(Salovey & Grewal, 2005). It appears that individuals who are emotionally
intelligent are more successful in personal and work relationships. According
Salovey and Grewal (2005), emotionally intelligent people are able to monitor
their own emotions and those of the people with whom they interact. They are
able to use that information to guide the way they think and behave. So, the
emotionally intelligent person knows when to express anger and when not to do
so. Such individuals are also good at manipulating their moods. Certain tasks
and interactions may, for example, be better accomplished when in a sad mood
than a good mood, and these people seem to know how to manipulate their own
moods to reach their goals. They also read the emotions of other people rather
well. In other words, some people trust their emotions and use them as
information. Others “do not take counsel” of their emotions because they think
that emotions are untrustworthy. Lopes, Salovey, Cote, and Beers (2005)
investigated the relationship of individuals’emotional
intelligence, their ability to regulate their emotions, to choose good interaction strategies, and to
accurately read others’emotions, and the quality of their friendships and social interactions.
Those people who were high on emotion regulation abilities (high emotional
intelligence) were more favorably rated by their friends and acquaintances, and
were more likely to be nominated by their peers as people who were sensitive
and helpful to others.
What does
this have to do with self-esteem? The connection may be the discovery that
individuals with high self-esteem take greater account of their emotions than
people with lesser self-esteem. Emotions seem to be very useful in a variety of
areas, including understanding other people, creative thinking, and even good
health (Harber, 2005; Salovey & Mayer, 1990). It appears that emotional
intelligence is strongly related to self-esteem (Harber, 2005). The research
showing that self-esteem is positively related to effective processing of emotional
information suggests that for those high in selfesteem, emotions serve as
important point of information. It is certainly true that a lot of the time we
do not have the facts of the situation, and all we have to go on is our “gut”
feelings.
Okay, so
high-self-esteem people use their emotions. Is that good? Well, it depends. The
evidence suggests that high-self-esteem individuals are much more likely to act
on their anger (Harber, 2005). In other words, sometimes they may pay too much
attention to internal emotional cues and not enough to what is going on in the
environment. As Kent Harber neatly puts it, “How we feel about our emotions may
be shaped by how we feel about ourselves” (p. 287).
Maintaining
Self-Esteem in Interactions with Others
When
interacting with others, human beings have two primary self-related motives: to
enhance self-esteem and to maintain self-consistency (Berkowitz, 1988).
Obviously, people have a powerful need to feel good about themselves. They
prefer positive responses from the social world. They become anxious when their
self-esteem is threatened. What steps do they take to maintain and enhance
self-esteem?
Enhancing
the Self According to Abraham Tesser’s self-evaluation maintenance (SEM) theory (1988), the behavior of
other people, both friends and strangers, affects how we feel about ourselves,
especially when the behavior is in an area that is important to our own
self-concept. The self carefully manages emotional responses to events in the
social world, depending on how threatening it perceives those events to be.
Tesser gave this example to illustrate his theory: Suppose, for example, that
Jill thinks of herself as a math whiz. Jill and Joan are close friends; Joan
receives a 99 and Jill a 90 on a math test. Because math is relevant to Jill,
the comparison is important. Therefore, Joan’s better performance is a threat,
particularly since Joan is a close other. There are a variety of things that
Jill can do about this threat. She can reduce the relevance of Joan’s
performance. If math
were not important to Jill’s own self-definition, she could bask in
the reflection of Joan’s
performance. Jill could also reduce her closeness to Joan, thus making Joan’s
performance less
consequential. Finally, Jill could try to affect their relative performance by
working harder or doing something to handicap Joan (Tesser & Collins,
1988).
This story
neatly captures the basic elements of SEM theory. The essential question that
Jill asks about Joan’s performance is, What effect does Joan’s
behavior have on my
evaluation of myself? Notice that Jill compares herself to Joan on a behavior
that is important to her own self-concept. If Joan excelled at bowling, and
Jill cared not a fig about knocking down pins with a large ball, she would not
be threatened by Joan’s rolling a 300 game or winning a bowling
championship. In fact, she would bask in
the reflected glory (BIRG) of her friend’s performance; Jill’s self-esteem would be enhanced because her friend did so
well.
The
comparison process is activated when you are dealing with someone who is close
to you. If you found out that 10% of high school students who took the math SAT
did better than you, it would have less emotional impact on your self-esteem
than if you learned that your best friend scored a perfect 800, putting her at
the top of all people who took the exam (provided, that is, that math ability
was important to your self-concept).
SEM theory
is concerned with the self’s response to threat, the kinds of social
threats encountered in
everyday life. Tesser formulated SEM theory by investigating people’s
responses to social
threats in terms of the two dimensions just described—relevance of the behavior
to the participant’s self-concept and closeness of the
participant to the other
person (Tesser & Collins, 1988). Participants were asked to remember and
describe social situations in which a close or distant other performed better
or worse than they did. Half the time the task was important to the participant’s
self-concept, and half the time
the task was unimportant. The participants also reported the emotions they felt
during those episodes.
Results
indicate that when the behavior was judged relevant to the self, emotions were
heightened. When participants did better than the other, distant or close, they
felt happier, and when they did worse, they felt more personal disgust, anger,
and frustration. When the behavior was not particularly relevant to the self,
emotions varied, depending on the closeness of the relationship. When a close
friend performed better than the participant, the participant felt pride in
that performance. As you would expect, participants felt less pride in the
performance of a distant person, and, of course, they felt less pride in the
friend’s performance when the behavior was self-relevant.
One
conclusion we can draw from this research and from SEM theory is that people
are willing to make somesacrifices to accuracy if it means a gain in
self-esteem. People undoubtedly want and need accurate information about
themselves and how they compare to significant others, but they also display an
equally powerful need to feel positive about themselves. This need for
self-enhancement suggests that in appraising our own performances and in
presenting ourselves to others, we tend to exaggerate our positive attributes.
In sum,
then, one way the self maintains esteem is to adjust its responses to social
threats. If a friend does better than we do at something on which we pride
ourselves, we experience a threat to that part of our self-concept. Our friend’s
achievement suggests that we may not be as good in an important area as we
thought we were. To
preserve the integrity and consistency of the self-concept and to maintain high
self-esteem, we can try to downplay the other’s achievement, put
more distance between ourselves and
the other so that we feel less threatened by the performance, or try to
handicap our friend. In each case, the self subtly adjusts our perceptions,
emotions, and behaviors in the service of enhancing self-esteem.
Self-Enhancement
and Coping with Disaster: The Survivors of
September
11, 2001
An
estimated 2,800 individuals lost their lives in the World Trade Center (WTC)
buildings on that traumatic and horrifying day in 2001. Thousands of other
individuals in the near vicinity or in the WTC survived but were exposed to
both physical and psychological trauma. Bonnanno, Rennicke, and Dekel (2005)
investigated how some survivors coped with this massive trauma. These
researchers were very interested in those people who, while directly exposed to
the attacks, showed few psychological effects of their experience. The study
focused on those “resilient” individuals who used a kind of unrealistic
self-enhancement strategy to deal with the trauma. These people in fact used
self-enhancing strategies all of their lives so they did not alter their
approach to deal with 9/11. The researchers wanted to know whether these
self-enhancing “resilients” were truly in control of their emotions or were
just whistling in the dark, so to speak.
Self-enhancement
in this context refers to the tendency to have overly positive or unrealistic
self-serving biases (Bonnanno et al., 2005). Many researchers think that
self-enhancement biases actually are very good things and lead to many positive
outcomes, including increased survival of serious, life-threatening illnesses
(Taylor, Lerner, Sherman, Sage, & McDowell, 2003). Self-enhancers who were
directly exposed to the attack on the WTC showed fewer post-traumatic and fewer
depressive symptoms than other individuals who were at the scene on September
11. Self-enhancers have a very positive view of themselves and believe that
they are in total control of themselves. They tend to project very positive
feelings. Are these feelings real, or are they just a front for underlying
problems?
Bonanno
and his associates (2005) found that while other people were rather annoyed at
the “resilient” self-enhancers and their remarkably upbeat attitudes in the
face of the tragedy, these self-enhancers did not seem to be aware of this and
in fact recovered from the trauma quicker than most, with fewer psychological
scars. So, if you don’t mind the fact that your friend might not appreciate your
attitude, self-enhancement seems to be a pretty good approach to life’s
vicissitudes.
Self-Esteem and Stigma
We have seen that people often define themselves in terms of
attributes that distinguish themselves from others. Sometimes these attributes
are positive (“I was always the best athlete”), and sometimes they are negative
(“I was always overweight”). Some individuals have characteristics that are
stigmatized—marked by society—and therefore they risk rejection whenever those
aspects of themselves are recognized. One would expect that culturally defined
stigmas would affect a person’s self-esteem.
Frable, Platt, and Hoey (1998) wondered what effect stigmas
that were either visible or concealable had on self-esteem. These researchers
had Harvard University undergraduates rate their momentary self-esteem and
feelings during everyday situations in their lives. Some of these students had
concealable stigmas; that is, these culturally defined faults were hidden from
the observer. The individuals were gay, bulimic, or came from poor families.
Others had more visibly socially defined stigmas; they were African American,
or stutterers, or 30 pounds overweight.
Frable and her coworkers thought that those people with
concealable stigmas would be most prone to low self-esteem, because they rarely
would be in the company of people who had similar stigmas. Other people who
belong to the “marked” group can provide social support and more positive
perceptions of the membership of the stigmatized group than can nonmembers. For
example, cancer patients who belong to support groups and have other strong
social support generally have more favorable prognoses than do those patients
who remain isolated (Frable et al., 1998). In fact, these researchers found
that those who were gay, poor, bulimic, or had other concealable stigmas had
lower self-esteem and more negative feelings about themselves than both those
with visible stigmas or people without any social stigmas at all. This suggests
that group membership that can offer support and positive feelings raises our
self-esteem and buffers us against negative social evaluations.
Although the Frable study indicates that visible stigmas have a
less negative influence on self-esteem than do the concealable ones,
conspicuous stigmas, such as being overweight, have definite negative effects
on self-esteem as well. Early in life we get a sense of our physical self.
Western culture pays particular attention to physical attractiveness, or lack
of the same, and it should not be surprising that our sense of our physical
appearance affects our self-esteem. As an aspect of appearance, body weight
plays a role in self-esteem. One need only gaze at the diet books and magazines
at supermarket checkout counters to confirm the importance of body types in our
society.
Miller and Downey (1990) examined the relationship between
self-esteem and body weight. They found that individuals who were classified as
“heavyweights” (to distinguish these people from individuals who were obese
because of glandular problems) reported lower self-esteem. This finding was
particularly true for females, but heavyweight males also tended to have lower
self-esteem. Interestingly, those individuals who were in fact in the
heavyweight category but did not think that they were did not have lower
self-esteem. This suggests that what is important is whether the individual is
marked with disgrace—stigmatized—in his or her own eyes. It may be that those
who are heavyweight but do not feel that they have to match some ideal body
type do not carry the same psychological burden that other heavyweights do.
This suggests that feelings about ourselves come from our evaluations of
ourselves in terms of our internal standards, our self-guides. It is probable
that heavyweights who had higher self-esteem had a better match between their
ideal and actual selves than did other overweight individuals.
Self-Esteem and Cultural Influences
Self-esteem, as you might think, is influenced by factors other
than one’s personal experiences. After all, we live and identify with certain
groups, small and large. We are students or professors at certain colleges and
universities, we root for various sports teams, we have various religious,
social, and national affiliations. All of these things influence our self
esteem.
Schmitt and Allik (2005) studied the relationship between
culture and “global self-esteem, defined as one’s general sense of how worthy
one is as a person.” These researchers employed a commonly used measure of
self-esteem known as the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale (RESS). They had this
instrument translated into 28 different languages and had 17,000 people in 53
different countries take the test. Researchers Schmitt and Allik (2005) found
that people in all nations have generally positive self-esteem. It seems that
positive self-esteem appears to be culturally universal. A closer analysis of
their data led these researchers to conclude that while individuals in all of
these 53 countries had meaningful concepts of what self-esteem meant, there was
also evidence indicating that in some countries (African and Asian cultures)
people are less likely to engage in self-evaluation, which, of course, is the
basis of self-esteem. Nevertheless, feeling positive about oneself seems to be
universal, and the assumption that self-esteem is usually higher or more
positive in individualistic cultures (e.g., the United States) as opposed to in
collectivist cultures (e.g., Indonesia) in which the group tends to be more
important seems not to be true (Schmitt & Allik, 2005).
What’s So Good about High Self-Esteem?
What can we conclude about our discussion of self-esteem? It
seems that high self-esteem is assumed to have positive effects, and low
self-esteem, negative effects. Recently, researchers such as Jennifer Crocker
have raised doubts about these conclusions and have suggested, based upon a
closer review of the research, that the real benefits of high self-esteem are
“small and limited” (Crocker & Park, 2004). Baumeister, Campbell, Krueger,
and Vohs, (2003) also argued that high self-esteem may lead to good feelings
and may make people more resourceful but does not cause high academic
achievement, good job performance, or leadership; nor does low self-esteem
cause violence, smoking, drinking, taking drugs, or becoming sexually active at
an early age.
Crocker, Campbell, and Park (2003) have examined the effects of
the pursuit of self-esteem rather than just examining who has low or high
self-esteem scores. Most individuals tend to judge their own self-worth by what
they need to do to be seen as a person of worth and value. In other words, they
judge their self-esteem by external reactions. It often means competing with
others. This explains to some extent the observation that high-self-esteem
individuals are quick to react violently when their self-esteem is questioned.
While we tend to think that high self-esteem is a really good
thing, we have not, as Roy Baumeister (2001) notes, looked closely at the
consequences, good and bad, of self-esteem on behavior. Indeed, the evidence
suggests that high-self-esteem individuals are more likely to be violent when
their self-esteem is threatened (Baumeister, 2001). This pursuit apparently
only produces rather temporary emotional benefits but imposes high costs.
Crocker et al. (2003) argue that the pursuit of self-esteem “interferes with
relatedness with other people, learning, personal autonomy, self-regulation,
and mental and physical health.”
Others have observed that while high self-esteem is related to
all kinds of positive behaviors, because self-esteem seems to be based upon
what people believe is the best way to live (their “worldview”), high
self-esteem can also be a cause of horrible and tragic events, not unlike
September 11, 2001. After all, in one worldview, “heroic martyrdom” is a good
thing (Pyszczynski, Greenberg, Solomon, Arndt, & Schimel, 2004, p. 461). So
high self-esteem in and of itself may not be good or bad. It depends upon the
way one behaves (Pyszczynski et al., 2004).
Implicit and Explicit Self-Esteem
The resolution to the question of what good is high self-esteem
may be found in the idea that there are really two kinds of high self-esteem.
The first is the kind of selfesteem that is below our conscious awareness. The
implicit self-esteemrefers to a very efficient system of self-evaluation that
is below our conscious awareness (Jordan, Spencer, & Zanna, 2005, p. 693).
As you might imagine, implicit self-esteem comes from parents who nuture their
children but do not overprotect them (DeHart, Pelham, & Tennen, 2006). This
kind of self-esteem is unconscious and uncontrolled by the individual (Dehart et
al., 2006). Implicit self-esteem is automatic and less likely to be affected by
day-to-day events.
In comparison, the kind of high self-esteem we’ve been talking
about, more fairly called explicit self-esteem, arises primarily from
interaction with people in our everyday life. We might expect that the two
self-esteems would be related, but that appears not to be the case (DeHart et
al., 2006). High implicit self-esteem is related to very positive health and
social attributes, while explicit self-esteem seems to be a more fragile or
defensive self-esteem, which accounts for the emotional reactions that threats
to these individuals evoke.
Self-Control: How People Regulate Their Behavior
Maintaining self-esteem is a very powerful motive. However, an
equally powerful selfmotive is to maintain self-control, a very good predictor
of success in life.
Self-Control and Self-Regulation
Social psychologist E. Troy Higgins (1989) proposed that people
think of themselves from two different standpoints: their own perspective and
that of a significant other, such as a parent or a close friend. He also
suggested that people have three selves that guide their behavior. The first is
the actual self, the person’s current self-concept. The second is the ideal
self, the mental representation of what the person would like to be or what a
significant other would like him or her to be. The third is the ought self, the
mental representation of what the person believes he or she should be.
Higgins (1989) assumed that people are motivated to reach a
state in which the actual self matches the ideal and the ought selves. The
latter two selves thus serve as guides to behavior. In Higgins’s
Self-Discrepancy Theory, when there is a discrepancy between the actual self
and the self-guides, we are motivated to try to close the gap. That is, when
our actual self doesn’t match our internal expectations and standards, or when
someone else evaluates us in ways that fail to match our standards, we try to
narrow the gap. We try to adjust our behavior to bring it into line with our
self-guides The process we use to make such adjustments is known as
self-regulation, which is our attempt to match our behavior or our self-guides
to the expectations of others and is a critical control mechanism.
Not only will individuals differ on the need to self-regulate,
so will people who live in different cultures. Heine and Lehman (1999) observed
that whereas residents of the United States and Canada showed a strong bias
toward adapting to others’expectations, Japanese citizens are less likely to
try to self-regulate. Heine and Lehman found that their Japanese participants
were much more self-critical than were North Americans and had greater
discrepancies between their actual self and the ideal or ought selves, but these
differences were less distressful for the Japanese and did not motivate them to
change.
The closer the match among our various self-concepts, the
better we feel about ourselves. Additionally, the more information we have
about ourselves and the more certain we are of it, the better we feel about
ourselves. This is especially true if the selfattributes we are most certain of
are those that are most important to us (Pelham, 1991). Our ability to
self-regulate, to match our performance to our expectations and standards, also
affects our self-esteem. In sum, then, we tend to have high self-esteem if we
have a close match among our selves; strong and certain knowledge about
ourselves, especially if it ncludes attributes that we value; and the ability
to self-regulate.
We know that the inability to regulate our self leads to
negative emotions. Higgins (1998) investigated the emotional consequences of
good matches versus discrepancies among the selves. When there is a good match
between our actual self and our ideal self, we experience feelings of
satisfaction and high self-esteem. When there is a good match between our
actual self and our ought self, we experience feelings of security. (Recall
that the actual self is what you or another currently think you are; the ideal
self is the mental representation of the attributes that either you or another
would like you to be or wishes you could be; and the ought self is the person
that you or others believe you should be.) Good matches may also allow people
to focus their attention outside themselves, on other people and activities.
But what happens when we can’t close the discrepancy gap?
Sometimes, of course, we simply are not capable of behaving in accord with our
expectations. We might not have the ability, talent, or fortitude. In this
case, we may have to adjust our expectations to match our behavior. And
sometimes it seems to be in our best interests not to focus on the self at all;
to do so may be too painful, or it may get in the way of what we’re doing.
In general, however, these discrepancies, if sizable, lead to
negative emotions and low self-esteem. As with good matches, the exact nature
of the negative emotional response depends on which self-guide we believe we
are not matching (Higgins & Tykocinsky, 1992). Higgins, Shah, and Friedman
(1997) reported that the larger the differences between the actual and ideal
selves, the more dejected and disappointed the individuals felt, but only if
they were aware of that difference. In a similar vein, the larger the discrepancy
between the actual self and the ought self, the more people felt agitated and
tense, just as the theory predicts. Again, this was true only for those people
who were aware of the discrepancy. These findings mean that when self-guides
are uppermost in people’s minds, when people focus on these guides, then the
emotional consequences of not meeting the expectations of those guides have
their strongest effects. People who indicated, for instance, that they were
punished or criticized by their parents for not being the person they ought to
be reported that they frequently felt anxious or uneasy (Higgins, 1998).
It turns out that discrepancies between what you are and what
you would like to be can serve as a very positive motivating force. For
example, Ouellete and her colleagues studied the effect of possible selves on
exercise. They reasoned that a possible self is a person’s idea of what they
might become. Now, that might be both good and bad. If I flunk out of college,
I might have to work in a factory. That’s one possible self. But the image that
these researchers were dealing with was one in which individuals were motivated
by a possible self that projected an image of significant positive bodily and
mental changes that would occur from an exercise program. They asked the
individuals to conjure up images of what successful completion of such a
program would mean for them. The results showed that these health images had a
significant impact on the behavior of these individuals. The possible self motivated
them to actually attain that image (Ouellette, Hessling, Gibbons, Reis-Bergan,
& Garrard, 2005). Of course, if we are not aware of the discrepancies
between what we are and what we’d like to be or what we should be, the negative
emotions that self-discrepancy theory predicts will not come to pass (Philips
& Silvia, 2005). Research has shown that when people are not particularly
focused on themselves, self-discrepancies go unnoticed. One might imagine that
a combat soldier would be untroubled by these psychological differences.
However, when self-awareness is high, discrepancies become very noticeable
(Philips & Silvia, 2005). Having positive self-esteem does not mean that
people have only positive selfevaluations. They do not. When normal people with
positive self-esteem think about themselves, roughly 62% of their thoughts are
positive and 38% are negative (Showers, 1992). What is important is how those
thoughts are arranged. People with high selfesteem blend the positive and
negative aspects of their self-concept. A negative thought tends to trigger a
counterbalancing positive thought. A person who learns she is “socially
awkward,” for example, may think, “But I am a loyal friend.” This integration
of positive and negative self-thoughts helps to control feelings about the self
and maintain positive self-esteem.
But some people group positive and negative thoughts
separately. The thought “I am socially awkward” triggers another negative
thought, such as “I am insecure.” This is what happens in people who are
chronically depressed: A negative thought sets off a chain reaction of other
negative thoughts. There are no positive thoughts available to act as a buffer.
The Cost and Ironic Effects of Self-Control
We have seen that the self has the capacity to engage in
effortful behavior to deal with the external world. Now, it is very likely that
most of the time, the part of the self that carries out this executive function
does it in an automatic, nonconscious fashion, dealing with the world in
neutral gear (Bargh & Chartrand, 1999). But when the self has to actively
control and guide behavior, much effort is required. Baumeister and his
coworkers (1998) wondered whether the self had a limited amount of energy to do
its tasks. If this is so, what would be the implications of self-energy as a
limited resource?
In order to explore the possibility that expending energy on
one self-related task would diminish the individual’s ability (energy) to do
another self-related task, Baumeister and his coworkers did a series of
experiments in which people were required to exercise self-control or to make
an important personal choice or suppress an emotion. For example, in one study,
some people forced themselves to eat radishes rather than some very tempting
chocolates. This, as you might imagine, was an exercise in self-control. Others
were allowed to have the chocolates without trying to suppress their desires
and without having to eat the radishes. All were then asked to work on
unsolvable puzzles. As shown in Figure 2.4, those who suppressed their desire
for the chocolate and ate the radishes quit sooner on the puzzle than those who
did not have to suppress their desire to eat the chocolate. Baumeister argued
that the “radish people” depleted self-energy. Baumeister calls this
ego-depletion, using the Freudian term (ego) for the executive of the self.
We all have had the experience of seeing a particularly
distressing movie and walking out of the theater exhausted. Research reveals
that if people see a very emotional movie, they show a decrease in physical
stamina (Muraven, Tice, & Baumeister, 1998). In a related study,
participants were given a difficult cognitive task to perform and were asked to
suppress any thought of a white bear. Research shows that trying to suppress thoughts
takes much effort (Wegner, 1993). Try not thinking of a white bear for the next
5 minutes, and you will see what we mean. After doing this task, the
individuals were shown a funny movie but were told not to show amusement.
People who had expended energy earlier on suppressing thoughts were unable to
hide expressions of amusement, compared to others who did not have to suppress
thoughts before seeing the movie (Muraven et al., 1998). All of this suggests
that active control of behavior is costly. The irony of efforts to control is
that the end result may be exactly what we are trying so desperately to avoid.
We have to expend a lot of energy to regulate the self. The research shows that
there are finite limits to our ability to actively regulate our behavior.
Thinking about Ourselves
Self-Serving Cognitions
In Garrison Keillor’s mythical Minnesota town of Lake Woebegon,
all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children
are above average. In thinking so well of themselves, the residents of Lake
Woebegon are demonstrating the selfserving bias, which leads people to
attribute positive outcomes to their own efforts and negative results to
situational forces beyond their control. A person typically thinks, I do well
on examinations because I’m smart; or I failed because it was an unfair
examination. We take credit for success and deny responsibility for failure
(Mullen & Riordan, 1988; Weiner, 1986). There is a long-standing
controversy about why the self-serving bias occurs in the attribution process
(Tetlock & Levi, 1982). One proposal, the motivational strategy, assumes
that people need to protect self-esteem and therefore take credit for successes
(Fiske & Taylor, 1984). We know that protecting and enhancing self-esteem
is a natural function of the self, which filters and shapes information in
self-serving ways.
Another way of looking at self-serving biases emphasizes
information-processing strategies. When people expect to do well, success fits
their expectations; when success occurs, it makes sense, and they take credit
for it. This bias, however, does not always occur and is not always
“self-serving.” Sedikides and his colleagues noted that people in close
relationships did not demonstrate the self-serving bias. The bias, according to
these researchers, takes a gracious turn for people who are close and is
reflected in the following quote: “If more than one person is responsible for a
miscalculation and the persons are close, both will be at fault” (Sedikides,
Campbell, Reeder, & Eliot, 1998). What this means is that neither you nor
your partner is likely to take more credit for success, nor will you or your
partner give more blame to the other for failure. Less close pairs, however, do
show the self-serving bias (taking credit for success or giving blame for
failure). The closeness of a relationship puts a barrier in place against the
individual’s need to self-enhance, as revealed by the self-serving bias.
Maintaining Self-Consistency
Another driving motive of the self in social interactions is to
maintain high self-consistency—agreement between our self-concept and the views
others have of us. We all have a great investment in our self-concepts, and we
make a strong effort to support and confirm them. Motivated by a need for self-verification—confirmation
of our self-concept from others—we tend to behave in ways that lead others to
see us as we see ourselves (Swann, Hixon, & De La Ronde, 1992). The need
for self-verification is more than just a simple preference for consistency over
inconsistency. Self-verification lends orderliness and predictability to the
social world and allows us to feel that we have control (Swann, Stein-Seroussi,
& Giesler, 1992).
People seek to confirm their self-concepts regardless of
whether others’ideas are positive or negative. One study showed that people
with unfavorable self-concepts tended to pick roommates who had negative
impressions of them (Swann, Pelham, & Krull, 1989). In other words, people
with negative self-concepts preferred to be with people who had formed negative
impressions of them that were consistent with their own views of themselves.
Another study tested the idea that people search for partners
who will help them self-verify (Swann, Hixon, & De La Ronde, 1992). Half
the participants in this experiment had positive self-concepts, and half had
negative self-concepts. All participants were told that they would soon have
the chance to converse with one of two people (an “evaluator”) and could choose
one of the two. Every participant saw comments that these two people had made
about the participant. One set of comments was positive; the other set was
negative (all comments were fictitious).
People with negative self-concepts preferred to interact with
an evaluator who had made negative comments, whereas people with positive
self-concepts preferred someone who had made positive comments. Why would
someone prefer a negative evaluator? Here is one participant’s explanation: “I
like the (favorable) evaluation, but I am not sure that is, ah, correct, maybe.
It soundsgood, but the (unfavorable evaluator)…seems to know more about me. So
I’ll choose the (unfavorable evaluator)” (Swann et al., 1992, p. 16).
In another study, spouses with positive self-concepts were
found to be more committed to their marriage when their mates thought well of
them. No surprise there. But in keeping with self-verification theory, spouses
with negative self-concepts were more committed to their partners if their
mates thought poorly of them (Swann et al., 1992).
People with low self-esteem do appreciate positive evaluations,
but in the end, they prefer to interact with people who see them as they see
themselves (Jones, 1990). It is easier and less complicated to be yourself than
to live up to someone’s impression of you that, although flattering, is
inaccurate.
Individuals tend to seek self-verification in fairly narrow
areas of the self-concept (Jones, 1990). You don’t seek out information to
confirm that you are a good or bad person, but you may seek out information to
confirm that your voice is not very good or that you really are not a top-notch
speaker. If your self-concept is complex, such negative feedback gives you
accurate information about yourself but doesn’t seriously damage your
self-esteem.
People not only choose to interact with others who will verify
their self-concepts but also search for situations that will serve that
purpose. If, for example, you think of yourself as a storehouse of general
knowledge, you may be the first to jump into a game of Trivial Pursuit. You
have control over that kind of situation. But if you are the kind of person who
can’t remember a lot of trivial information or who doesn’t care that FDR had a
dog name Fala, then being forced to play Trivial Pursuit represents a loss of
control.
Finally, keep in mind that most people have a positive
self-concept. Therefore, when they self-verify, they are in essence enhancing
their self-image, because they generally get positive feedback. So for most of
us, self-verification does not contradict the need for self-enhancement. But as
Swann’s research shows, people also need to live in predictable and stable
worlds. This last requirement is met by our need for self-verification.
Self-Awareness
Self-verification suggests that at least some of the time, we
are quite aware of how we are behaving and how other people are evaluating us.
In fact, in some situations we are acutely aware of ourselves, monitoring,
evaluating, and perhaps adjusting what we say and do. Although sometimes our
behavior is mindless and unreflective, we probably spend a surprising amount of
time monitoring our own thoughts and actions. Of course, there are some
situations that force us to become more self-aware than others. When we are in
a minority position in a group, for example, we become focused on how we
respond (Mullen, 1986). Other situations that increase self-focusinclude
looking in a mirror, being in front of an audience, and seeing a camera
(Scheier & Carver, 1988; Wicklund, 1975).
When people become more aware of themselves, they are more
likely to try to match their behavior to their beliefs and internal standards.
In one study, two groups of participants—one in favor of the death penalty, the
other opposed—had to punish another participant, a confederate of the experimenter
(Carver, 1975). Some participants held a small mirror up to their faces as they
administered an electric shock (no shock was actually transmitted).
When participants self-focused (looked into the mirror), they
were truer to their beliefs: Their attitudes and their actions were more in
harmony. Highly punitive individuals (those who favored capital punishment)
gave much more shock when the confederate made errors than did the less
punitive, anti-death-penalty individuals. No such differences existed when
participants did not self-focus.
Self-focus means that the individual tends to be more careful
in assessing his or her own behavior and is more concerned with the self than
with others (Gibbons, 1990). Self-focused individuals are concerned with what is
proper and appropriate, given their self-guides. Self-focused individuals
probably have an increased need for accuracy and try to match their behavior to
their self-guides. That is, they try to be more honest or moral.
Self-focusing may lead to positive or negative outcomes,
depending on how difficult it is to match performance with the self’s standards
and with the expectations of others. Sometimes, for example, sports teams
perform better on the road, especially in important games, than they do on
their home field or arena. There is a definite homefield advantage—that is,
teams generally win more games at home than on the road.
However, baseball teams win fewer final games of the World
Series than expected when they play on their home fields (Baumeister, 1984).
Their performance declines due to the pressure of the home fans’expectations
(“choking”).
Does audience pressure always lead to choking? It depends on
whether the performer is more concerned with controlling the audience’s
perceptions or with living up to internal standards. If concern centers on
pleasing the audience, the pressure may have a negative effect on performance.
If concern centers on meeting personal standards, then audience pressure will
have less impact (Heaton & Sigall, 1991).
Self-Knowledge and Self-Awareness
Accurate information about ourselves as we actually are is
essential to effective self-regulation (Pelham & Swann, 1989). Such
knowledge may lead us to adjust our self-guides, to lower our expectations or
standards, for instance, in order to close the gap between what we are and what
we want to be or think we ought to be. Although it is effortful to adjust our
standards, it is important to minimize discrepancies between the actual and the
other selves. Small discrepancies—that is, good matches between the actual self
and self-guides—promote a strong sense of who we really are (Baumgardner,
1990). This knowledge is satisfying, because it helps us predict accurately how
we will react to other people and situations. It is therefore in our best
interest to obtain accurate information about ourselves (Pelham & Swann,
1989).
Research confirms that people want to have accurate information
about themselves, even if that information is negative (Baumgardner, 1990). It
helps them know which situations to avoid and which to seek out. If you know
that you are lazy, for example, you probably will avoid a course that promises
to fill your days and nights with library research. There is evidence, however,
that people prefer some sugar with medicine of negative evaluation; they want
others to evaluate their negative attributes a little more positively then they
themselves do (Pelham, 1991).
People who are not certain about their attributes can make
serious social blunders. If you are unaware that your singing voice has the
same effect on people as someone scratching a fingernail on a chalkboard, then
you might one day find yourself trying out for the choir, thereby making a fool
of yourself. Greater knowledge of your vocal limitations would have saved you
considerable humiliation and loss of face.
Managing Self-Presentations
Eventually, we all try to manage, to some degree, the
impressions others have of us.
Some of us are very concerned about putting on a good front,
others less so. Several factors, both situational and personal, influence how
and when people try to manage the impressions they make on others. Situational
factors include such variables as the social context, the “stakes” in the
situation, and the supportiveness of the audience. Personal factors include
such variables as whether the person has high or low self-esteem and whether
the person has a greater or lesser tendency to self-monitor, to be very aware
of how he or she appears to other people.
Self-Esteem and Impression Management
One research study looked at how people with high and low
self-esteem differed in their approaches to making a good impression
(Schlenker, Weigold, & Hallam, 1990). People with low self-esteem were
found to be very cautious in trying to create a positive impression. In
general, they simply are not confident of their ability to pull it off. When
presenting themselves, they focus on minimizing their bad points. On the other
hand, people with high self-esteem tend to focus on their good points when
presenting themselves.
As might be expected, people with low self-esteem present
themselves in a less egotistical manner than those with high self-esteem. When
describing a success, they tend to share the credit with others. People with
high self-esteem take credit for success even when other people may have given
them help (Schlenker, Soraci, & McCarthy, 1976). Interestingly, all people
seem to have an egotistical bias; that is, they present themselves as
responsible for success whether they are or are not.
Social context makes a difference in how people present
themselves in different ways for people with high and low self-esteem. When
participants were told to try to make a good impression in front of an
audience, people with high self-esteem presented themselves in a very
egotistical and boastful way, pointing out their sterling qualities (Schlenker
et al., 1990). People with low self-esteem toned down egotistical tendencies in
this high-pressure situation, becoming more timid. It seems that when the
social stakes increase, people with high self-esteem become more interested in
enhancing their self-presentation, whereas their low-self-esteem counterparts
are more concerned with protecting themselves from further blows to the self
(Schlenker, 1987).
Self-Monitoring and Impression Management
Another factor that influences impression management is the
degree to which a person engages in self-monitoring—that is, focuses on how he
or she appears to other people in different situations. Some people are
constantly gathering data on their own actions. These high-self-monitors are
very sensitive to the social demands of any situation and tend to fit their
behavior to those demands. They are always aware of the impressions they are
making on others; low self-monitors are much less concerned with impression
management.
High self-monitors are concerned with how things look to
others. For example, they tend to choose romantic partners who are physically
attractive (Snyder, Berscheid, & Glick, 1985). Low self-monitors are more
concerned with meeting people with similar personality traits and interests.
Most high self-monitors are aware that they fit their behavior to the
expectations of others. If they were to take a self-assessment like the one
presented in Table 2.2, they would agree with the “high self-monitor”
statements (Snyder, 1987).
It is not surprising to learn that high self-monitors are more
prone to sex-based discrimination when they are in a position to hire someone
in a business situation. When hiring for jobs that are sex-typed (either a
male- or female-dominated job), human resource (HR) professionals who were high
self-monitors were much more likely to hire the physically attractive job
candidate rather than an equally or more qualified less attractive candidate (Jawaher
& Mattson, 2005).
Interestingly, this only occurred for a sex-typed job. For
gender-neutral jobs, the HR people hired the best candidate regardless of
appearance. Again, high self-monitors appear to be heavily influenced by the
notion of who “should” fill the job based upon appearance rather than judging
individuals on less obvious, but more important internal facts, such as the
skill they have to do the job.
Self-Presentation and Manipulative Strategies
When people engage in impression management, their goal is to
make a favorable impression on others. We have seen that people work hard to
create favorable impressions on others. Yet we all know people who seem
determined to make a poor impression and to behave in ways that are ultimately
harmful to themselves. Why might these kinds of behavior occur?
Self-Handicapping
Have you ever goofed off before an important exam, knowing that
you should study?
Or have you ever slacked off at a sport even though you have a
big match coming up? If you have—and most of us have at one time or another—you
have engaged in what social psychologists call self-handicapping (Berglas &
Jones, 1978). People self-handicap when they are unsure of future success; by
putting an obstacle in their way, they protect their self-esteem if they should
perform badly.
The purpose of self-handicappingis to mask the relationship
between performance and ability should you fail. If you do not do well on an
examination because you did not study, the evaluator doesn’t know whether your
bad grade was due to a lack of preparation (the handicap) or a lack of ability.
Of course, if you succeed despite the handicap, then others evaluate you much
more positively. This is a way of controlling the impression people have of
you, no matter what the outcome.
Although the aim of self-handicapping is to protect the person’s
self-esteem, it does have some dangers. After all, what are we to make of
someone who goes to a movie, rather than studying for a final exam? In one
research study, college students negatively evaluated the character of a person
who did not study for an important exam (Luginbuhl & Palmer, 1991). The
self-handicappers succeeded in their self-presentations in the sense that the
student evaluators were not sure whether the self-handicappers’bad grades were
due to lack of ability or lack of preparation. But the students did not think
very much of someone who would not study for an exam. Therefore,
self-handicapping has mixed results for impression management.
Still, people are willing to make this trade-off. They are
probably aware that their self-handicapping will be seen unfavorably, but they
would rather have people think they are lazy or irresponsible than dumb or
incompetent. A study found that people who self-handicapped and failed at a
task had higher self-esteem and were in a better mood than people who did not
handicap and failed (Rhodewalt, Morf, Hazlett, & Fairfield, 1991).
Self-handicapping can take two forms (Baumeister & Scher,
1988). The first occurs when the person really wants to succeed but has doubts
about the outcome. This person will put some excuse in place. An athlete who
says that she has a nagging injury even though she knows she is capable of
winning is using this kind of impression-management strategy. People will really
be impressed if she wins despite her injury; if she loses, they will chalk it
up to that Achilles tendon problem.
The second form also involves the creation of obstacles to
success but is more selfdestructive. In this case, the individual fears that some
success is a fluke or a mistake and finds ways to subvert it, usually by
handicapping himself in a destructive and internal manner. For example, a
person who is suddenly propelled to fame as a movie star may find himself
showing up late for rehearsals, or blowing his lines, or getting into fights
with the director. It may be because he doesn’t really believe he is that good
an actor, or he may fear he won’t be able to live up to his new status. Perhaps
being rich and famous doesn’t match his self-concept. Consequently, he
handicaps himself in some way.
The abuse of alcohol and drugs may be an example of
self-handicapping (Beglas & Jones, 1978). Abusers may be motivated by a
need to have an excuse for possible failure. They would rather that others
blame substance abuse for their (anticipated) failure than lack of ability.
Like the athlete with the injured leg, they want ability to be discounted as
the reason for failure but credited as the basis for success. Because the
self-handicapper will be embarrassed if the excuse that clouds the link between
performance and outcome is absurd, it is important that the excuse be
reasonable and believable. Self-handicapping is thus another way people attempt
to maintain control over the impression others have of them.
Self-Handicapping in Academics
Although self-handicapping may have short-term benefits (if you
fail at something, it is not really your fault, because you have an excuse in
place), the behavior has some long-term drawbacks. Zuckerman, Kieffer, and Knee
(1998) did a long-term study of individuals who used self-handicapping
strategies and found that self-handicappers performed less well academically
because of bad study habits and had poorer adjustment scores. They tended to
have more negative feelings and withdrew more from other people than did others
who did not self-handicap. As you might have predicted, all of this negativity
started a vicious cycle that led to even more self-handicapping.
Edward Hirt and his colleagues at the University of Indiana thought
that perhaps self-handicapping was really an impression management technique.
That is, people put an excuse in place so that if they fail or just do poorly,
people will not attribute the failure to the self-handicapper’s ability. If I
don’t take the practice test offered by the professor and go to a movie the
night before the exam, then maybe my poor performance will be attributed to
something other than my lack of academic skills. Indeed Hirt, McCrea, and Boris
(2003) set up such a scenario and found that while other students did not
attribute failure to the student’s (lack of) ability, their general evaluations
of him were very negative. So the moviegoer’s attempt to manage the impressions
others have of him at least partially failed.
As Hirt and his colleagues showed in a series of three studies,
there are trade-offs when one uses self-handicapping as a strategy. In one
sense, it accomplishes the person’s goal of avoiding the dunce cap: I did not
do well because I am a goof-off but at least I am not stupid. But there are
serious interpersonal coasts for self-handicapping.
People observing the actions of a student who doesn’t study and
gets drunk the night before the big test conclude that he is irresponsible or,
just as likely, that he is trying to manipulate others’perceptions of his
behavior (Hirt et al., 2003).
The Impression We Make on Others
How accurate are we in assessing the impression we convey? In
general, most people seem to have a good sense of the impression they make on
others. In one study designed to look at this question, participants interacted
with partners whom they had not previously met (DePaulo, Kenny, Hoover, Webb,
& Oliver, 1987). After each interaction with their partners, participants
had to report on the impressions they had conveyed to the partner. The
researchers found that the participants were generally accurate in reporting
the kind of impression their behavior communicated. They also were aware of how
their behavior changed over time during the interaction and how it changed over
time with different partners.
Another study also found that people are fairly accurate in
identifying how they come across to others (Kenny & Albright, 1987); they
also consistently communicate the same impression over time (Colvin &
Funder, 1991). People tend to overestimate how favorably they are viewed by
other people, however. When they err, it is on the side of believing that they
have made a better impression than they actually have.
However, sometimes we can assume that other people recognize
how we are really feeling, especially when we wish they could not. It appears,
according to research by Thomas Gilovich and his coworkers, that we believe our
internal feelings show more than they actually do (Gilovich, Savitsky, &
Medvec, 1998). In general, we seem to overestimate the ability of others to
“read” our overt behavior, how we act and dress.
Gilovich and his colleagues called this the spotlight effect,
suggesting that we as actors think others have us under a spotlight and notice
and pay attention to what we do. This increased self-consciousness seems to be
the basis of adult shyness: Shy people are so aware of their actions and
infirmities that they believe others are focused (the spotlight) on them and
little else. The reality of social life is quite different and most of us would
be relieved to know that few in the crowd care what we do or think. For
example, in one study, college students wore a T-shirt with the ever-popular
Barry Manilow on the front, and the wearers much overestimated the probability
that others would notice the T-shirt. The spotlight does not shine as brightly
as we think.
Gilovich
and colleagues (1998) believe that we have the same preoccupation (that others
notice and pay attention to our external actions and appearance) with respect
to our hidden, internal feelings. They called this the illusion of
transparency, the belief that observers can read our private thoughts and
feelings because they somehow “leak out.” In one of the studies designed to
test the illusion of transparency, Gilovich and colleagues hypothesized that
participants who were asked to tell lies in the experiment would think that the
lies were more obvious than they really were. Indeed, that was the result. In a
second experiment, participants had to taste something unpleasant but keep a
neutral expression. If, say, your host at a dinner party presented a dish you
thoroughly disliked, you might try to eat around the edges for politeness’sake
and not express disgust.
How successful might you be at disguising your true feelings? The tasters in
the Gilovich studies thought that they would not be very successful at all.
Instead, observers were not likely to discern that the tasters were disgusted
with the food or drink. Again, people overestimated the ability of others to
determine their true, internal feelings.
Although
most people seem to have a good sense of the impression they make on other
people, some do not. In fact, some people never figure out that they are
creating a bad impression. In a study designed to look at why some people do
not seem to pick up on the cues that they are making a bad impression,
individuals were observed interacting with people who had continually made
either good or bad impressions (Swann, Stein-Seroussi, & McNulty, 1992). Swann
and his coworkers found that participants said basically the same generally
positive things to both types of individuals. However, they acted differently
toward the two types of individuals. They directed less approving nonverbal
cues (such as turning away while saying nice things) at negative-impression
individuals than at those who made positive impressions.
The
researchers concluded that there are two reasons why people who continually
make bad impressions do not learn to change. First, we live in a “white-lie”
society in which people are generally polite even to someone who acts like a
fool. Second, the cues that people use to indicate displeasure may be too
subtle for some people to pick up (Swann et al., 1992).
The Life
of James Carroll Revisited
In our
brief examination of the life and work of best-selling author James Carroll, we
had the opportunity to see how the author’s personal life—his family, his teachers,
and his religion, as
well as the momentous social events that occurred during his formative
years—shaped and influenced both his personal and social selves. Certainly,
these events provided Mr. Carroll with rich materials for his writings, which
include 10 fiction and nonfiction books.
Chapter
Review
1. What is
the self?
The self
is, in part, a cognitive structure, containing ideas about who and what we are.
It also has an evaluative and emotional component, because we judge ourselves
and find ourselves worthy or unworthy. The self guides our behavior as we
attempt to make our actions consistent with our ideas about ourselves.
Finally,
the self guides us as we attempt to manage the impression we make on others.
2. How do
we know the self?
Several
sources of social information help us forge our self-concept. The first is our
view of how other people react to us. From earliest childhood and throughout
life, these reflected appraisals shape our self-concept. We also get knowledge
about ourselves from comparisons with other people. We engage in a social
comparison process—comparing our reactions, abilities, and personal attributes
to those of others—because we need accurate information in order to succeed.
The third source of information about ourselves is observation of our own
behavior. Sometimes, we simply observe our behavior and assume that our motives
are consistent with our behavior. Finally, one may know the self through
introspection, the act of examining our own thoughts and feelings.
3. What is
distinctiveness theory?
Distinctiveness
theory suggests that people think of themselves in terms of the characteristics
or dimensions that make them different from others, rather than in terms of
characteristics they have in common with others. An individual is likely to
incorporate the perceived distinctive characteristic into his or her selfconcept.
Thus, distinctive characteristics help define our self-concept.
4. How is
the self organized?
People
arrange knowledge and information about themselves into self-schemas.
A
self-schema contains information about gender, age, race or ethnicity, occupation,
social roles, physical attractiveness, intelligence, talents, and so on.
Self-schemas
help us interpret situations and guide our behavior. For example, a sexual
self-schema refers to how we think about the sexual aspects of the self.
5. What is
autobiographical memory?
The study
of autobiographical memory—memory information relating to the self—shows that
the self plays a powerful role in the recall of events.
Researchers
have found that participants recalled recent events more quickly than older ones,
pleasant events more quickly than unpleasant ones, and extreme events, pleasant
and unpleasant, more quickly than neutral episodes.
Pleasant
events that especially fit the person’s self-concept were most easily recalled.
6. What is
self-esteem?
Self-esteem
is an evaluation of our overall worth that consists of both positive and
negative self-evaluations. We evaluate, judge, and have feelings about
ourselves. Some people possess high self-esteem, regard themselves highly, and
are generally pleased with who they are. Others have low self-esteem, feel less
worthy and good, and may even feel that they are failures and incompetent.
7. How do
we evaluate the self?
We
evaluate the self by continually adjusting perceptions, interpretations, and
memories—the self works tirelessly behind the scenes to maintain positive
selfevaluations, or high self-esteem. Self-esteem is affected both by our ideas
about how we are measuring up to our own standards and by our ability to
control our sense of self in interactions with others. Positive evaluations of
the self are enhanced when there is a good match between who we are (the actual
self) and what we think we’d
like to be (the ideal self) or what others believe we ought to be (the ought
self). When there are differences between our actual self and either what we
would like to be or what we ought to be, we engage in selfregulation, our
attempts to match our behavior to what is required by the ideal or the ought
self.
8. What is
so good about high self-esteem?
Researchers
have found that while high self-esteem may lead to good feelings and may make
people more resourceful, it does not cause high academic achievement, good job
performance, or leadership; nor does low self-esteem cause violence, smoking,
drinking, taking drugs, or becoming sexually active at an early age.
9. What
are implicit and explicit self-esteem?
Implicit self-esteem refers to a very
efficient system of self-evaluation that is below our conscious awareness.
Implicit self-esteem comes from parents who nurture their children but do not
overprotect them. This kind of self-esteem is unconscious and automatic and is
less likely to be affected by day-to-day events.
In
comparison, the more well-known conception of self-esteem, explicit
self-esteem, arises primarily from the interaction with people in our everyday
lives. High implicit self-esteem is related to very positive health and social
attributes, while explicit self-esteem seems to be a more fragile or defensive
self-esteem, which accounts for the emotional reactions that threats to these
individuals evoke
10. What
is emotional intelligence?
Emotional
intelligence is a person’s ability
to perceive, use, understand, and manage emotions. Research indicates that
individuals who are emotionally intelligent are more successful in personal and
work relationships. These individuals are very aware of their own emotional
states, use them as information, and are very good at reading other people’s
emotions. 11. What is
self-evaluation maintenance (SEM) theory? According to Abraham Tesser’s
self-evaluation maintenance (SEM)
theory, the high achievement of a close other in a self-relevant area is
perceived as a threat.
In
response, we can downplay the other’s achievement, put more distance between ourselves and the other,
work hard to improve our own performance, or try to handicap the other.
*********************************************
Social Psychology
Third Edition
Kenneth S. Bordens Indiana University—Purdue University Fort Wayne
Irwin A. Horowitz - Oregon State University
Social Psychology, 3rd Edition
Copyright ©2008 by Freeload Press
Illustration used on cover © 2008 JupiterImages Corporation
ISBN 1-930789-04-1
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or
by any means, electronic, mechanical, recording, photocopying, or otherwise, without the prior written
permission of the publisher.
Printed in the United States of America by Freeload Press.
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